9.30am...today
hoho.....jap td 1 of my collegue dtg jumpe i...sbb ape.....dikatakan bos department die dh dpt 1 email..dr timbalan pengarah...email tu mengatakan yg mamat ni tak buat keje..dok borak sane sini....lorrr....yg tak best name i disebut dlm email tu..." 4 ptg terserempak ngan en..F***** sedang berborak dgn lydia..." name i lagi....haih..tak abis2 i dikaitkan dgn 'keruntuhan moral' org di sekeliling i...well..well... lantak le org nk kate ape....buat en F*****...sabo je le menghadapi email layang itu..hahaha..pindah je le ke pasir gudang tu.....org dh xsuke...blah je le.....nape name i tak naik utk perpindahan ek...mmg le...i ngan en f***** lain2 department n perjawatan....
woitt..tu diskas keje ke dok mencatuk tu...lalalala
yesterday...8.40pm...amanpuri...
i g umah john..sian die demam...i g ade 2 reason:
1: sbb nk bagi ubat demam yg i dpt last week...
2: sbb i rindu pd die..even we all jumpe almost everi day..i still rindu pd die..
hurm.... am i too much....adore him too much...akan muak ke i pd die..1 hari nanti...i dunt think so..mayb die yg akan muak jumpe i selalu...ntah le...i takot rship i ni endup mcm my last rship... sbb rase muak tgk muke..perangai..kerenah i...for 8 yrs...akhirnyer we breakup..dgn alasan dh tak cinta pd i...sbb for 8yrs tgk mende yg same...hurmmm..tsk..tsk..tsk....nape i selalu kene mende mcm ni....boring ke idup di samping i...ataupun mmg i ni sebenarnye ditakdirkan utk tidak menjadi milik sesiape pun..dlm erti kate lain..adakah i ni akan jalani hidup i di hari tua i seorg diri..tanpa org bername suami..n bernama anak sbg penyambung generasi...kekadang rase mcm dh give up nk letakkan sesiape pun dlm hati i..tapi dgn john i tewas lagi..wpun saat i jumpe die..i tau die sudah punye seseorg....i still rase 'elektric' chemistry tu mase i ngan die bersalaman 4 the first time...
10.30am...today...ape yg i bebelkan kat sini...ape yg cube i fikirkan ni..i sdr tak tau...nape i rase mcm sedih je...rase mcm tak disayangi...tak dihargai...nape ek...??? ape lagi yg i nak john buktikan pd i...yg die benar2 mencintai n menyayangi i..seperti mane i mencintai n menyayangi die....i tau die tersgt mencintai n menyayangi i...ntah le...maybe trauma dari breakup yg lps wat i rase mcm ni..i rase i mcm tak dpt nk puaskan hati john..i rase ape yg i dh buat utk die sepanjang we all kenal..tak cukup lagi...
>> syg..if u be able to read my blog...n this entry...i want u to know...how often we're going out..or dating..my luv for u will growth..i hoping u'll do the same....and i would like to be yours forever......luv you syg.......
